Here are some key points that I would advise you to concentrate on

• • • Your current point does not need to be your end point. You can change your life at any time.
    • It is not a weakness to ask for help, it is a sign of strength to see something that is not working right for you, and finding an expert who can assist you fixing this. You don’t need to know everything to change. You just need to start.
    • “We are not taught in school how to think”. Don’t beat yourself up for doing what you needed to survive with the knowledge you knew at the time. Yet, it is time to change now.

   

   

   

   

   

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  • • We are often shaped by the culture we grow up in, what our parents tell us, our culture experiences, our religious experiences. These shape us as kids, but as we age we start to create our own identity. You can decide who you want to be.
    • Your past does not need to dictate your future.
    • A mindset coach like James can help you address the thoughts, emotions and issues that are holding you back. You can work on yourself, but it can be difficult to avoid falling into bias, blame etc. A mindset coach can help you look at things and understand them with a clear heart and mind, that won’t let you create a story to avoid dealing with things.
    • “The mind can be a trickster, always playing tricks on you.” We can create a story on an event or situation, and tend to look at the negative side of things. When you can learn the skills to look from above your thoughts, rather than just reacting to them, you start to understand the message from them, and what true fixes you can do to resolve them.
    • Medication is a great short-term help, but rarely helps after a long time without further work on how you identity with the pain, problems etc.
    • “Frequency beats chemisty”. A change in your internal frequency with meditation, breath work etc, can help you level up your frequency and help you heal and grow more than meds can do after their short term fix.
    • “Everyone wants the quick fix and in a lot of case no one wants to do the inner work” that really helps.

   

   

   

   

   

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  • Silence can really help, no screens, no distractions, let silence fall and truly feel your body, listen to the thoughts pass, be comfortable with yourself and learn to love yourself.
  • Travel outside your normal environment can be a great way to help see things in a different light, by changing your environment, you can change how you view things. I certainly find going for a walk in nature really helps me think clearer, more positive and just helps me smile and recharge myself. Try it!
  • “Pain to purpose“. You can learn how to use your pain to push you on, to chase a purpose in your life.
  •  Change will take time, don’t expect miracles but you will notice gradual change. People will comment on it, and you are normally the last one to know. Work on yourself each day and you will be surprised at how amazing a change that will take place.
  • If you are feeling suicidal, please don’t do anything drastic. Give it one more try. Reach out to a friend. Speak to someone. Email me. Suicide is never the answer.
  • Treat your ‘I can’t go on point’ as the starting point to discovering the new you and starting the journey to your true self and happiness. You have found what hasn’t worked, so take time to find what does for you.
  • Take some time out and make yourself the priority, work on yourself, fix your health, exercise, try new things, cull broken relationships, learn to be happy with yourself.
  • “Be committed to change“. Try to do something every day.
  • “Start small. Micro-goals“. Start small and build up. Don’t expect miracles, but work on yourself and let the wins roll together into a rolling ball of success.

• • A gratitude journal to record small things you are grateful is a great tool, it shows you how much you have in your life to be appreciative for.
  • “You are the mountain, and your thoughts are the clouds” See them pass by. You don’t always need to react, believe them or pay them attention. Look at them from above, are the thoughts true? Worthy of your time? Helpful? You know the real you, your thoughts are just parts of your brain suggesting things based on your bias, current mindset etc, they are not always true, helpful or worth your time. Listen to your true self. Separate yourself from feelings, emotions and thoughts.
  • “Usually anger comes from the past“.
  • “Whatever we are afraid of, if we don’t deal with it, it owns us“.
  • “Forgiveness is one of the hardest things we can do”. Forgive yourself. Stop beating yourself up, stop destroying yourself. You can’t change things, you will be “on a hamster wheel to nowhere.”
  • “Know thyself. That is the journey. The journey within“. Stop looking outside yourself, you can learn to be happy, your are worthwhile and deserving of happiness, health and love, especially to yourself. “You have to go and find who you are“.
  • Write out a list of things that you love about yourself. Repeat it everyday and learn to love yourself, learn the value you give to the world and others. It is not a chance to be egotistical, but you need to learn your own value.

 

 

 

 

 

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• Use the concept of ‘Future Self’. You are always building the future self of you every day. Each of your actions today are creating the future self that you will be. Make your actions work for you, act right, to become the person you want to be, in three months, six months etc.
• Stop expecting and start accepting. Nothing will fix you. No marriage, no kid etc. Nothing will make you whole. You just need to discover yourself and your purspose and work on loving yourself and doing good in the world, and you will feel complete in a way that no material goods or experiences will ever provide you with.
• “Be authentic. Stop trying to fit in … stop trying to fit into situations.” Be yourself and your people will find you.
• “A new future is always available … who do you want to be.”
• “Your inputs shape your outputs“. What you take in shapes you as a person. You can’t expect a diet of soap TV shows, negative news, social media binges etc to give you a positive mindset. Go to the gym, journal, meditate etc. Give yourself the best, positive mindset inputs to help you be at your best and do the things you want in life.
• “Everything is within you“.
• Look to help others, look to give back to others. Share a smile, a help or a positive interaction. Make the world around you better in someway each day.
• Select a coach that you resonate. Interview your coaches. Do not select the first one. Be the interviewer rather than just someone that pays their bills. Find someone you are happy and confident with, and work with them.